It isn’t easy getting a “real” massage in Bangkok

thailand bar girls

bar girls and massage girls


When my wife was with me people in the area around the hotels were discrete. But she returned to Cambodia and I stayed on for more medical treatment. Since then walking around as a man it’s like I have a neon arrow over my head pointing to my wallet and genitals. I get offers for any kind of sex I can think of and some I can’t. On my way to the train station I will sometimes get offers of some kind about every 10 steps or so. I was at a cash machine and dropped a photo out of my wallet at 11 AM and a nice middle aged lady pointed it out to me and I thanked her. When I came out of the cash machine she smiled and said, “You want girl? I get you girl.” “No” I said politely. “You want boy? I get you boy.” “No I don’t want a boy.” I said laughing. “Girl do anything you want, massage, bj, one girl, two girl no problem.” “No thank you” I said, “I need to go meet my wife.” A credible excuse since it was 11 AM and I was at the subway station. Her final offer was “You want blow?” she acted out snorting coke for me in case I was slow. “Bye now” I said moving on.
There is a great golf mall here, banks, great restaurants and all around it is interlaced with massage parlors of the kind notorious for offering lousy massages and cheap sex. And they are everywhere with girls sitting out calling to you from outside on the stupe “Massaa sir?” I know not all Thailand or even Bangkok is this way and I don’t blame the Thai women. Thai women I am told, often get fired from regular legitimate jobs when they turn 30. I took a look at job ads in the papers here. They all seemed to want women between 18 and 30. It was printed right in the ad, for normal everyday jobs. We in the U.S. need to remember that it wasn’t that long ago that women couldn’t even vote in the states and employers could openly discriminate according to age. All us boomers could be out of jobs if that was still the case, at least the women.
Since I am here for medical reasons I needed an honest to goodness theraputic, relaxing massage that didn’t involve my genitals. My chiropractor suggested Health Land so I thought I would try.
Health land massage room

Great atmosphere to really relax and enjoy a massage

It is strickly professional and amazingly huge. It has 8 stories of rooms and scores of massage techniques. I got maybe the best massage I’ve ever had. An hour and a half for 850 bht (just under $30) and worth every bht. Totally professional and well trained. The whole facility is upscale, clean and relaxing to be in with soothing music and gentle auromas. A simple but finishing touch was a flower floating in a bowl below the real massage table that I could look at when face down. While the majority of men here are obviously looking for the other kind of massage or there wouldn’t be hundreds and hundreds of them, for someone looking for relaxing, therapeutic massage I highly recommend Health Land Spa.
Healthland spa

Health Land Spa Lobby